Sunday, July 31, 2011

As Seen On TV

Watching TV is truly one of America's pastimes.  I know baseball is actually the national pastime but watching TV has got to be a close second.  It sucks you in.  You think you're just going to watch 15 minutes of Jersey Shore while you eat your breakfast and then suddenly 4 hours later, you're still watching The Situation walk around with his shirt off while Ron and Sammie fight for the 367th time, wondering if they are going to break up.  (Answer: Yes they will.  And then they will get back together.  And then break up.  Continue cycle.)  Or maybe you're into medical dramas like Grey's Anatomy or ER... who knew hospitals could be so sexy?  (I still have a crush on Carter from ER.)  Or Law and Order/CSI?  There's certainly enough versions of those to go around.  (In my opinion, the only one that matters is Law and Order: SVU... partially because Ice T as an actor makes me laugh.  Also, the Law and Order theme song is classic.)  But whatever your TV pleasure is, they all have one thing in common... commercials!  Here are my thoughts on a few of these 15-30 second marketing gems.

~ I hate commercials for butter or margarine.  This is not a vegan thing.  These commercials have been on this list long before I ditched dairy.  They gross me out because the people in the commercial put sooooo much butter or "buttery spread" on their toast or muffins.  There's like a layer half an inch thick sometimes.  Butter is not a sandwich filling people.  It's not like icing on a cupcake that you swirl around on top like a pyramid.  It should melt away and be your silent partner in culinary crime.

~ Snuggle Fabric Softener Commercials.  Ever since I was a little kid, I have wanted the Snuggle Bear mascot as a pet.  He's so damn cute and well, snuggly.  However, I don't actually use Snuggle brand products so I do not think he is a very effective salesman.  Perhaps he should consider a career in hospitality instead.

~ Commercials for pretty much any prescription drug make me laugh.  When they get to the part about side effects of the drug, I like to see how bad they can get.  Sometimes, the drug is taken for a fairly minor problem, but the list of side effects is super long and fairly serious.  If there is risk that I am going to develop cancer, lose an arm or have my organs spontaneously combust inside of my body, then I will stick with the heartburn, thank you very much.

~ Interactive Commercials get a thumbs down.  No, I do not want to text 55555 to find out the name of my true love.  I already know it.  His name is Carter.  See first paragraph.  No, I do not want to text 33333 to find out what my Jersey Shore nickname is.  A Facebook app already did that for me and it's E Pow.  I'm sure it will catch on soon.  No, I do not want to text 44444 to get a hot new ringtone.  They are always rap/hip hop songs and I'm not cool enough for my phone to blow up constantly with Ludacris raps.  If they offered Kenny G though, that would be another story.  Just kidding, I keep my phone on vibrate.

What do you guys think?  Any commercials that you particularly love or hate?

Peas and love people!

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